location: Transition > Testosterone > Monthly Updates > Three Months
Three Months on T
August 15, 2003
I grew a lot more mustache hair this month, it's definitely starting to fill in. Still no sign of sideburns, chin, or neck hair. I'm getting pretty anxious about the sideburns, but they're not even threatening yet.
The hair on the back of my legs is starting to get darker and longer. The hair on my upper thigh is now visible even to other people (aka you don't have to do a close inspection to notice there is darker hair growing there). My happy trail is much happier this month, and I now have a bunch of random really dark hairs there as opposed to my one last month. The hair just past my pubic hair line on my legs is much, much darker and is coming in thicker, more pube-like. The place where my chest hair grows together is getting darker and can be seen up to about 4 inches above my belly button. I think my pubic hair and underarm hair has gotten longer, too.
Nothing too noticible in the body shape area. I feel like I can wear my khaki work pants lower on my hips (to try to narrow out my body), but it doesn't make sense that that would be related to the T, considering it's not going to change the bone structure at all. It could be that my butt is a tiny bit smaller so I'm not filling them out like I used to. Or it could be that my pants are really stretched out.
I told my self I was going to work out a little this month, but I felt like I should wait until after my chest surgery on the 27th, as I want my muscles to be in their "average" state for the surgery. Despite not working out at all, I definitely can lift more, and my stamina for heavy lifting is longer, too.
The acne on my face is still annoying, but I don't think it's gotten worse. I have much more acne on my back and chest though. For right now, I'm just dealing with it. If it gets much worse, I might try an over-the-counter acne wash, but I'm definitely going to stay away from antibiotics, because I've had a history of yeast infections.
My voice has been cracking a lot recently, especially when I get excited or try to talk more loudly. It feels like its very scratchy, like there is flem in my throat at all times but I can't clear it out. I used to sing along with the Indigo Girls every time I was along, and I could only sing Emily's part (she sings in a higher range). But when I recently tried to sing along to the same songs, I found that I couldn't even reach Emily's notes, because my voice would crack and give out. It was much more comfortable to sing in Amy's (lower) range, notes I could not have reached just three months ago. You can listen to my voice clips here.
I have finally stopped bleeding entirely from my June 11th full hysterectomy! I guess I will no longer include this section in future updates.
My primary libido is still to enjoy pleasing my partner, though I feel somewhat more of an urgency for myself. I wouldn't say that's necesarily just the T working; it's probably because I'm beginning to feel better about myself. I'm really looking forward to the time I'm healed from my chest surgery and I can just take my shirt off wtihout worrying about trying to be under the covers, too.
The "little guy"
I've noticed a lot of growth in girth and a little growth in length this month. It's incredibly sensitive, especially to gentle stimulation. When excited, I can feel an actual difference between it being "flacid" and "having a hard-on." It is currently about 4cm long.
It's been much harder to notice the little subtlties that I once noticed. I think sometimes I notice them, but I don't appreciate the importance of them anymore. I've been trying really hard to take notice of the little things and really think about what they mean. Similarly, it's much harder to multi-task. I've found myself much more methodical and more withdrawn from socializing with perfect strangers. For example, I'd much rather be in a quite library putting books in order than helping customers at a video game store. I've always had this personality, but it's definitely more intense now. Yet, at the same time, when I do interact with perfect strangers, I do so in a different, more confident way.
Sweat -- I sweat so much more easily than I ever did. Eww.